Who is the first person you rush to tell when you fall in love?
If you’ve read my new novel GUILTY AS GRACE (no spoilers, I promise!), you’ll know apart from boy falling in love with girl, I briefly put a spotlight on mothers and daughters.
I should say this now: my mother is great. Don’t do what people always try to do- Are you writing about yourself? Are you the one on the book cover? Seriously, the last time I had natural hair was in secondary school, thank you very much! But of course, as a writer, I open my eyes and heart and tap into something deeper than what happens on the surface and then I write about it.
But back to business. There is nothing as important as relationships. And in this new year, relationships will define almost all your experiences. Whether it’s with God or man, whether they are old or new friendships, whether it’s formal or casual, you can’t get past relationships.
But there is something about mothers and daughters. Obviously, it’s one of those relationships you are “stuck” with for the rest of your life, for better or for worse, until one of you (very sadly) goes away. Even then, no matter how old you get, or how far you go, you won’t ever stop hearing the voice of reason, encouragement, or criticism, that is known as your mother’s voice.
I’m at that interesting age where I have a mother and could be a mother (many of my friends are mums). And I look at how society is wired for mums and sons to have this special bonding and dads and daughters to also have their thing going. I’m not saying there is a problem with either. All I’m saying today is, if your mother is well and alive, don’t take her for granted. And maybe you’ve had history but you could make your mother your friend. And for those mums starting out, there is really no need to “compete” with your daughters, because down the line, she could become your very best friend. And you know what best friends do, they tell each other things. Won’t it be nice if we could tell our mums things without the pressure of being judged? Won’t it be nice if your daughter came to you about her struggles instead of posting some vague or depressing comment on social media? Won’t it be great if between two generations, we could pass along some wisdom (hard earned as all mothers will agree) and get some love back in return?
Wouldn’t it be just great?
Yes, this is a New Year’s Post, not a Mother’s Day post! And sometimes, starting well means forgiving what has been. And it’s the people closest to us who have the capacity to hurt us the most. And maybe for someone reading this, forgiveness is the way to start this year. To forgive and extend a hand of grace to all the broken relationships that took away a chunk of our heart. That’s the only way we can be whole again.
As always, remain high on the grace of Jesus!
More on relationships next time. Don’t forget to subscribe to my blog! Or share to your friends.
Those are the Ecklu Girls in the picture below.